A New Year of Random Ramblings


Might as well ring in the new year correctly with random thoughts that don't have much to do with each other.

Hello All, Sorry for the delay.

Here are my thoughts for today. Do any of you ever get crazy dreams you just wake up and wonder "what the...?" when you think about the bits and pieces you remember.

Well that's been happening to me lately. It feels like it's been quite a long time since I had weird dreams, but for the past week or so, I've had an active subconscious.

I only remember the end of one odd dream that took place before last night, so I can't add most of them to this, and really I don't remember much of last night's/this morning's dream either.

I just remember that I was actually dreaming about new coworkers.

It was like we were at my dad's house, but we weren't. In the dream I could have sworn I was telling people it was my dad's house. It had a feeling like being his home, but when I think about it after I'm awake, it looks absolutely like no home I am aware of seeing.

Also, this dream distinctly had two coworkers I don't recall ever dreaming about before. One of them is like a team leader type of person, like a head cashier. Not really a boss, but the team leader you should listen to when it comes to cashiering updates. The other was a coworker I actually banter and enjoy hanging out with at work.

All I remember is that we were either working or out and about in the world. Then I remember us being in a room upstairs... This is where it's weird. It felt like it was upstairs, like an attic room. Yet, there was a door to the outside, like it opened up to a parking lot, and something like a strip mall was right next door when you stepped outside and looked to your right.

So the one I joke around with is rather perverted. Insanely intelligent, but definitely one for the crude and dirty jokes. He's got a twisted sense of humor. This could be why I enjoy his company.
Anyway. The three of us are in the bedroom, myself sitting on the bed with my back propped against the headboard, the two of them standing near the foot of the bed on my side and we are just chatting away about nothing important that I recall. Then, I forgot what I said, I asked for something, not sexual, and all of a sudden my buddy pulled off his pants and hopped in bed. I didn't see anything I shouldn't. He had a faded, well worn, buttoned-down, long sleeve denim shirt on, with a t-shirt (which I think could have been maroon, can't confirm this) underneath, and a dingy baseball cap on his head. The shirts hung low enough to just see legs. I looked at him like "Why on earth did you just get in bed w/ me with no pants on?" since I knew him without pants wasn't going to help with what I asked for, and he didn't act like he was about to do something sexual either. His response was this somewhat hurt expression similar to one of a little kid who tried to be thoughtful and found out he did something wrong. Like a little boy who just gave a bouquet of flowers to his mom, not realizing he just tore up her garden to give them to her. His response, "I didn't want to get the bed dirty." In other words, he thought his jeans were too dusty and dirty and he didn't want to mess things up.

Then we bantered about something, and the next thing I know, someone like my mom is at the door, and as I'm talking to her, the guys talk about how we need to head out and get back to work. So while I'm talking to her about something, I realize they are all packed up and out at the truck, and I can't seem to find clothes I find acceptable to wear to work in this bag that I guess is mine.
Next...I wake up.

I don't know why, but waking up to this kept with me throughout the morning.

Yet, it doesn't feel as disturbingly weird as the dream I woke up to this weekend.

This is all I can remember from that one (and this is just from the last time I woke up. Each time I woke up the dreams just got weirder, so I stopped trying to go back to sleep):

I was cooking. I was making a couple of dishes for dinner. Then my friend decided he was going to cook something (or I realized he was on the other side of the kitchen cooking main meat like entree). So it worked out that my dishes, like mac and cheese or chili and some vegetable (can't remember, I know noodles and cheese were involved) would be side dishes. Yet, for some reason, when I put the noodles in some pot to boil or something, the pot was dirty. It seemed as if the pot was used to make chili and wasn't cleaned out, so there were remnants of it in there now with my food. I noticed this after putting my macaroni noodles in there. Then somehow I guess there was some sort of cheese sauce in there. I thought I had something on the side I was going to put the noodles in once they were ready, so I didn't want that stuff to affect them too much. Therefore, I just kept stirring the noodles to make sure the other stuff didn't stick too much. But it was like it was being this incredibly thick cheese w/ chili sauce I just kept stirring the noodles in, and I was hoping it wouldn't become that, and I kept trying to stir it to help it not thicken up into something, and the more I kept stirring, the more it kept becoming some thick Mac & Cheese with light chili sauce thing that I didn't want... Then the alarm went off, and I woke up.

So what has the new year brought me so far? Weird dreams and the reality of my weight gain I need to get control over.

And for those who remember my older posts, the chance to work with the candy making masters did not work out. I am no lollipop grasshoppa. But my current boss sees my potential to be more than what he can offer me at the store. So along with defending me to those who care more about image than productivity, he apparently has connections in the candy world and said he would ask some friends he knows if they have any openings for candy apprentices.
We'll see how that goes.

Other than that, I feel confusion with love. My old flame that has never really extinguished seems as if he is trying to have the fire light again. We even seem to be getting some of our connection back.

The morning w/ the weird dreams (including the cooking one), I finally got fed up with going back to sleep. I decided to focus on a random thought or day dream. Since I was laying in bed next to my potential, I decided to think about the possibility of being with another, to see if I could do it.

Well, after about 30-40 minutes of not being able to get past flirting, my old flame did a head jerk and looked over at me for a second. As he was putting his head back down, he asked me what's wrong at the same time I asked him.

Me: You're the one who just jerked up and looked at me. I'm just laying here. What's wrong with you?

Him: You feel weird.

Me: What do you mean?

Him: I don't know, you feel weird. You have a weird vibe and I've been awake for like 40 minutes. Don't touch me.

I don't know why, but I found this amusing. Apparently me trying to think about flirting with another man while laying next to him actually woke him up. It's something I've noticed.

That, and his ability to banter about us having children again. We haven't talked like that in quite a long time. To me, it's the affection and talking about us being together in the future is what's giving me the hint that he's considering a future between us. However, no conversation about anything has taken place.

Other than that, today is a new day. I began writing this post yesterday. I feel I've jumped topic plenty that hopefully I will remember some other ones for a different posting day. I have a bit of a sore throat today and actually drank tea. I'm not much of a tea drinker. I have tea, but there is only about one tea I prefer to drink, and this wasn't it. My sister recommended a mint tea with Cayenne pepper, honey, and lemon for my swollen throat. All I can say is that it doesn't feel swollen anymore, and doesn't quite hurt. Not to mention, I can still feel the mint in the back of my throat hours later.

I hope everyone is doing well. For those who actually do new year's resolutions, I hope you are sticking to them. I'm sure I should have some. I currently have one. It's associated to being more healthy and weight reduction. We'll see how that pans out.

I hope everyone has wonderful days ahead of them. If you don't, let me know. I'm sure we can find ways to thump people over the head with sticks, paint some pottery, or something to make things better.